Welcome to “Holding On To Second Chances…Even if You Think You Don’t Have One Right Now“
In this amazing presentation interview with Sher Tavares we discuss key second issues that will help you be better in every way possible.
So if you want to be the best version of yourself (without having to go back to your old ways), watch this presentation right now!
In this, you’ll discover: Some things that you can possibly do with the life you have been blessed with even in this pandemic.
Here’s where we are right now…
Holding on to things that are important
Learning how to get to where you want to be
Going through pitfalls and laughing about it
Tips #1 – Just Get Started
Finding the right people to be around
Getting someone to tell you straight
Tips #2 – Know Your Life Struggles In The Season Your In Now
Understand you can do itWhat layers do you have to peel off
Tips #3 – You Can Do It With The Right Support
Understand where you want to beCan you get there in time
My biggest takeaways for you from this update are:
Take Sherry’s example of what can be done in a few years
Hold on to those opportunities when they come
Failing is just part of the game
More Information: Read The Transcript below
To learn more about how you can be better in every way possible and be the best version of yourself (without having to go back to your old ways), . at www.stoptrippingoverpennies.com
Sher Tavares (00:01):
All right. Let’s see. All right. All right. Welcome. Welcome. Welcome. Hello everyone. I have a, I have a special guest. Let’s see if we’re going to get this live. We’ll get this all is going on and we will figure out how we can get this. But I have a special guest. Welcome to the real talk. Real, real change. Real stories. Real change. 2.0, I’m your host Gordon Wat. And today for the relaunch of the show, I have a very special guest. My dear friend, Sher Tavarez, and today’s topic is holding on to second chances. And we’re specifically was her rock bottom. You ain’t going to want to miss this. I want to put this, I want to share this also that you guys that’s watching this. Let’s see, and we can figure out how we can get this into your hands and all you can be working with. Let me pump this intro in here and we’ll just get going. Redo. Oh crap. We just, we just, we had a
Sher Tavares (01:25):
Sher Tavares (01:32):
Let’s get this show on the road. All right. Welcome. Welcome. I’m yours host Gordon Wat on today’s relaunch. Like I stated earlier is going to be part of a show that I’ve been waiting for her to get in a long time. And my dear friend Sher Tavares is been with me through thick and thin. I’ve been with her for so long. And what better launched this, this real talk program by talking about second chances, welcome Sher Tavares to the program. Hi, did we have some tech technical difficulties? Oh, what did I do? No, you’re fine. On my page. And I’d like, Oh, you’re fine. It is just a matter of. She’s going to be streaming. She’s dreaming. She’s living the lifestyle, the laptop lifestyle. What, let me, let me give you a little introduction about how share came.
Sher Tavares (02:27):
Sher Tavares is a well known expert of the, of the subject of holding onto second chances, addiction and moving forward and has graciously graciously considered to this interview show podcasts or wherever you got going on, where you ever you listen to, whether it’s going to be live on Facebook, YouTube, and with all the different platforms platforms. She’s here with me to share a personal extensive knowledge and experience. So every recovering mom, dad, addict, go getter anyone that is struggling with moving forward. Even with this situation, that’s going, you know, we decided to do this on a Saturday morning because you know, you got online school going on and you have everything else going on. So I decided let’s pivot like everybody else in business and give the most value on the data of everybody can at least watch the replay. And she’s going to show you how she, she did it and enjoy who you become at the end of the tunnel.
Sher Tavares (03:20):
What makes Sherry so special to this show since moving past all the turmoils, and she has been through some turmoil, these guys, you can attest to that because I’ve been, we’ve been together for a while. Now. She has recently launched her own podcast called the recovering mom. Raw and unedited is an Instagram superstar in my eyes and is currently mentoring organization of about a thousand promoters and customers for her own business. Right. She has taught me more about family than she could ever know. That’s all there. In fact, she, I believe in her so much in her capabilities. I had a write the back page of my book when she was through going through these struggles, right? To put her in a position where she is potentially the superstar she is today. I want to, I mean, we can go on through stories about this, but you know, if time allows, we’ll get to some things that might help others move on from drastic events, especially right now with the situations going on and holding on to dear life to second chances, because we both know about second chances thank you again for joining us on this live show.
Sher Tavares (04:30):
Let’s just jump right in. If you can share how you got started with our audience and figure out how we can do this together. Right? Give a little bit about yourself, Sherry. Okay. Well, first of all, thank you Gordon. For that introduction, I feel like I just walked the red carpet, But it’s such an honor to be, um, doing this interview with you finally, after all these years, it’s also been an honor, um, uh, watching you do what you’re doing right now. Like just the work that your time that you volunteer into our community, especially into the youth at risk is, um, very inspiring and motivating. And it keeps me wanting to become a better person just watching you go through that because I mean, let’s face it a backpack and a pair of socks or
Speaker 3 (05:28):
Why you came
Sher Tavares (05:31):
My back story as, um, I’m a mom, I’m a grandma. Um, and I’ve been in self rehabilitation for a little over four years now, July 21st, 2020. I just celebrated my fourth year of being, um, a drug free. Uh, before that, prior to that, and Gordon can attest this,
Sher Tavares (05:58):
I face planted into earth, like no other. And it was like that it was super, super fast. And, um, as fast as I had gained everything materialistically, I had lost it all. So by the end of while I was in my addiction, the last couple of days I spent, um, a lot of the times actually I spent home less. So as a homeless addict, um, here in Las Vegas, find myself couch surfing from house to house. Never really had a place to call home. Um, Gordon can attest to that as well because he would drive around Las Vegas
Sher Tavares (06:41):
Sher Tavares (06:46):
No, it’s it. I don’t, a lot of people will be like what in the world, but I don’t regret the journey
Sher Tavares (06:54):
That I’ve met. Correct.
Sher Tavares (06:56):
I just truly believe that if I did not go through what I went through, um, not just in my addiction, but prior to that as well. Um, I probably wouldn’t be here today. I probably wouldn’t be the person I am today and I probably wouldn’t have impacted as many lives, um, as I do today. So as much as I’d like to thank God for all the blessings that he is now coming back to me, I always thank him for that journey because it’s because of that journey. I am where I am today.
Gordon Wat (07:35):
Absolutely, absolutely. I mean, I can, I can truly attest many, um, I’m, I’m the type of friend for Sherry where she would call and she can attest to a lot of these things where, where I’m the friend that just knocks sense into where she has to cry blocker in a room. Me and her husband, Kalani Kalani would come tell me about situations. I would go driving around looking for, because I always knew the true potential she had if she had, if she had the right mentor, the right blade and what the beauty of it is, a lot of times we need to go through this process, this own journey, even like with her business right now, she used to come to my house. I only can give only. I had a friend, tell me if you listen to what Gordon is doing, he only drops hints at what you can possibly do.
Gordon Wat (08:28):
Cause I can’t do the work for you. Right? Part of the process is, is going through those ups and ups and downs and what kind of things that you might experience along the way. And I’m very, very so happy to say that, you know, the thing that she’s doing right now and helping other recovering women with our podcasts, like for me, I help as much people as I can because it’s all about holding on to second chances and doing the blessing, the blessing, the blessings that you have and sharing it with other people. And that’s why a lot of the times people have to go through their own journey. And what, let me ask you this, what roadblocks that stick into your head or when it was that one time when you knew you hit your rock bottom.
Sher Tavares (09:15):
When I knew I hit my rock bottom, um, it was probably the day that the day that I left that whole scene I was at, I don’t even remember why I was Gordon. Um, I do remember that I was laying on the bathroom floor. I was crying. Um, I had, um, I had a fairly substantial amount of, of drugs on me. And all I could think about was I wanted to swallow that whole bag and just not ever wake up again, you know, because I did not know how to fix it. I was so far gone in my addiction that I was thinking to myself, Holy crap, like, how do you even dig yourself out of something like this? And how do I, how did I even get here? You know? And so, um, I, my rock bottom for me was I, I was almost going to, I was almost going to end my life.
Sher Tavares (10:23):
And then, you know, of course God intervened, but for me, that was my rock bottom. And, um, it was just something that came over me. Like, I don’t know what it was, but something in me was just like, you’re not gonna do this. You’re not gonna do this. You know? And low and behold, um, I, then I think Kalani was gonna call me back that day, but he did, he called me back and he was just like, where are you? You know? And he came and he got me, and that was the end of that journey, you know, had, I, I believe in my heart, had he not come and get me? I don’t know. I don’t know where I’d be today. I could be dead. I could still be out on the streets or I could be in jail prison. Right, right, right. So it was those three. And it’s scary to think where I was. And it’s scary to think where I could be had God not intervened the way he did and had Kalani not come and just be like, you know, I can’t use the words
Gordon Wat (11:38):
I want to tell you
Sher Tavares (11:40):
Not had he not done that. I just don’t know where I would be. You know,
Gordon Wat (11:47):
This is going to be, this is going to be something that probably you don’t even know about in your journey, right? No, no. I want to tell you straight out, Kalani came to me a few times. Right. And I said, let’s go get her. Right. And me and Kalani had a long talk about you and your situation and everything else. I was kind of disappointed, but you don’t mean you can almost, you can also, you know, I’m kind of, again, I’m not a very emotional person, but right now I’m kind of, because we talked to Kalani a few times too. You mean she has more to give, even though we’ve been through all this stuff. And a few times came to my house, we talked and it was like, go get her. It was when it was my exact, even with a kind of disappointing face. Right. And I went on and, and, you know, try to look for you also, but you know, that’s, that’s all said and bygones because look at where you are right now. Look at, look at where the situation. I mean, I, me and Sherry went to see Tony Robbins, Eric Worre events in the hopes for this day to come where I can actually interview her without her crying. Right. Yeah. Don’t do it put on my lashes.
Gordon Wat (13:06):
And it’s just going to show that I just, I just love how I knew it. Always in my heart that one day you will be able to help thousands of people that you’re doing right now and to have the life that you truly deserve. And that’s the topic for today because a lot of times we, all we need is second chances. Do you mean, look at, look at the situation that I’m in now in what I have going on for myself. And I just want to carry that blessings on to much more of the people. And a lot of, a lot of the people that’s watching this, I want to watch this on the replay can relate to your story in a much bigger fashion, because they always ask me Gordon, where, where do I start? Where, how can I, you know, let me ask you another question. How long did it take you to get where you are today? Not just years wise, but walk us through the process of some of the things for business, life self-help and everything else that you’ve been through during the course of these few years,
Sher Tavares (14:06):
Where, where did I begin?
Gordon Wat (14:09):
So what made it tick, where you became this Instagram superstar to Instagram, super star, recovering your today. And my friend, other people understand where you started, what was the middle, was the beginning, the middle and the end to get where you are handling a thousand people in your business and organization. Because some of my, my people, the women I’m helping right now needs to hear some sort of thing that it can be done. Yeah. Life after addiction.
Sher Tavares (14:49):
Um, for me, it, it, didn’t this living now, business-wise you guys. I had, I did not know I had this. I did not know that this would be my life. Had you told me to, when did I start this business almost two years ago? Had you told me this almost two years ago? I would have been like, ah, I don’t know, because I’ve dabbled in a lot of different things online and tried to do the things and it just, none of it never worked. So, um, you know, it, it wasn’t until I found this opportunity that like, I, I saw myself aligned with everything, but it didn’t start off like that. And I didn’t start off aligned with everything. Um, it was a journey of trial and error through trying to balance work life, staying, you know, like trying to cope, use coping skills, um, to deal with life stressors so that I don’t like get overwhelmed and my head starts spinning around like an exorcist and, um, you know, and just try to, um, take it one day at a time.
Sher Tavares (16:10):
So for me, um, it took a lot of really, really my, for me, it was took a lot of like just sitting down and writing out where it is that you want to be in life. Right. You know? And then why do you want to be there? And you can just say like, Oh, I want to be, I want to be, let’s take sobriety. Okay. It’s an easy subject for me to talk to about, but sobriety people tell me, Oh, I just want to be clean and sober. Okay. Any one of us can be clean and sober, but why do you want to be clean and sober? And it’s not just about being clean and sober, right? Cause if you want to really be successful on your recovery journey or any journey, you didn’t want to write anything different. You’ve got to, um, you have to, what I’ve learned is that we, you have to detox from everything you have to detox from your past.
Sher Tavares (17:21):
You have to detox from the negative mindset. You need to detox from bad habits. You need to detox from all that lies that we tell ourselves in our head that we cannot do things. And so that’s why, um, even with my business and health and wellness, and even I’m coaching women to recovery, it’s like mindset is super important. If you’re going to start anywhere, start with the, mindseybecause you cannot still walk around with this negative mindset and expect your recovery to be, uh, a successful one or expect, um, you know, your goals or your business to be a successful one. If you’re constantly walking around in that negative mindset.
Gordon Wat (18:07):
Right, right. Right. I mean alive. I have, um, I have, uh, in fact I have, um, one of, one of my group members that’s here and you know, she’s just a, that’s where I want to be. And I’m going to tell you, I’m going to shout out to you, Julie, right now, this is a prime example. One of many that have done it. And she’s in the same position as you were a few, a few years ago, but it just takes a little bit of time. The process, the pain, the tears are just part of the journey and everything else that we have have going on because balancing a lot of stuff is going to take experience wisdom. Let me start thinking. I can, I can talk about with just Sherry alone, how many failures meetings things. But I knew in deep in my heart, she was gonna make it to here where she is right now today. Because sometimes you just need somebody to see what’s inside of you besides yourself. Just one of, one of the, one of my many friends that you know, means so dear to me, because sometimes that’s all, you need somebody to support you in every way. Been there done that. Like even in her description, she’s been there, done that came back from the dead
Sher Tavares (19:24):
Gordon Wat (19:24):
I think so many things went through so many things through where she is right now that anybody can do it. If you just stick to the path, you mean even like for us in business, both of us, you mean, in fact, I just had a friend tell him that Gordon, why, why you doing this bad? I said, because my path took me to becoming experienced, being a father, a good man, a person of integrity where it’s like, Sherry taught me this. Right. And it’s like, cause if you guys knew me from the past, everything was about money and business. And that I can do like, it’s like riding a bicycle, but doing this doo-doo diaper changes, all this other stuff is all noodle, but I’m experiencing that. I can put this stuff in. Um, is there a particular story example you’d like to share that really sums up your experience in holding on to that second chance? Right. Is there one that stands out that in years that, you know, because it’s, it’s a story that you tell that’s so dear to you, that you could share with the audience of people that are going through an abusive relationship, relationship problems, getting over this COVID thing, going on, getting over that addiction, getting over a prison time, , all this, putting your fact one story that you, um, hold dearly to you, especially like when you go on stage or when you’re on the webinars, what is your one story?
Sher Tavares (20:59):
Um, the story that I always tell is my rock bottom story. Yes. I tell my rock bottom story, because for me, um, you know, if you’re like from the outside looking in, just knowing that wow, a homeless drug addict actually, you know, turned her life around, um, runs a successful business, um, you know, gain like got her family. I, I basically everything that I lost that was priceless, meaning money cannot buy. I, that was my why. What’s my, why? Um, I was like Gordon, uh, very money, money driven, um, very materialistic in our old life. Um, it’s not on the clearance rack. It’s not,
Sher Tavares (21:56):
Sher Tavares (21:59):
Versus, uh, our old life where we would walk into any store and be like, yeah, give me that data that, but anyways, um, it, my rock bottom story, I always tell my rock bottom story. And I start with my rock bottom story, because I believe that at some point in life, people are going to hit rock bottom and everybody’s rock bottom is going to be at different levels. And depending on where you are, um, you know, it’s, you could, there is nothing that a person cannot do without a strong mindset. Okay. So I thought I would never get out of it. Right. And so I wanted the easy way out, but I had to work the steps. I had to find something that worked for me. I had to change my environment. I had to change my mindset. I had to, um, just fully die of my old self to become my new self. That makes sense.
Sher Tavares (23:11):
Um, and from there, I just, I did not know what I was doing because I was the type of person that if I didn’t know, or if I wanted something, I’d go out and buy it or pay somebody to do it for me. You know what I mean? And so this is something that I have to do on my own recovery is something that, or building a life is something that you have to do on your own. I didn’t see you really, really, really want it to be successful if you really, really, really want it to last, you won’t take the easy way out. You will get into trenches. You will, you know, dish out blood, sweat, and tears, and you will do whatever it takes to create the life that you want.
Gordon Wat (23:55):
Absolutely. Absolutely. It’s it’s it goes so true because a lot of the times you want, everybody thinks you have an overnight success and then overnight never worked because Sherry’s been and myself have been digging our Wells for years. Yeah. Yeah. I might not have my five car garage, three apartments and looking over the top of Waikiki anymore, but
Sher Tavares (24:25):
Well, building Gordon doesn’t have his building anymore,
Gordon Wat (24:30):
But yeah. I mean, I’m, I’m, I’m from what you see from my life. And how do you think I’m the happiest I’ve ever been Sherry? Yes, I do. And
Sher Tavares (24:42):
To watch you build the life that you have now, I mean, it was, it’s like watching you, um, that’s why I have to laugh every time your wife like posts things like when we were in quarantine and you were like doing all these renovations, it was like, you rebuild your house is like our life. Like you’re, you’re rebuilding and you’re renovating and that’s something that’s going to be constant. No matter until the day we die. Right. We’re always going to be wanting better. We’re always going to be wanting to do things to make us better. And it’s the same as your house. You’re always going to do maintenance. You’re always going to renovate. You’re always going to want to add things to make it better. Right. So watching you do all these little projects to your house and your wife is like, Oh my God, I need to get home. I would just laugh because I’m thinking to myself, this is him rebuilding his life.
Sher Tavares (25:48):
Sher Tavares (25:50):
I was, it wasn’t like me watching you rebuild your life, like your home. What is your life? You know, they say home is where the heart is. And I’m just like, you know, just laughing like, Oh, there Gordon goes again,
Sher Tavares (26:01):
Rebuilding his life, adding something
Sher Tavares (26:04):
To it, to make it better. You know? And now that it is your life, like you have an amazing wife, you folks have the most cutest baby ever. Like, I can’t wait to squeeze them. Um, and just like, although you and I, aren’t where we want to be. We are, we’re going to get to where we want to be. But success is not always, we, you and I were brought up in that world. Success is what’s in our bank bank account. Right, right, right. Right. And this day and age, I think success is what’s in our life account, the relationships that we build, relationships that we build, the life that we create for ourselves and our family. And what we put out into the community, I think is three of the things that money cannot, you cannot compare that to any type of monetary items.
Gordon Wat (27:01):
Right. Right, right. Right. I mean, for me, like you, you know, like you had money, your family said money, your brothers had money. I’ve had money. I have money where you had to do what you can’t even spend all the money, but, and you cant even carry the money. Right. But it did, was fulfill my shortcomings on the inside, which is like you said, like where I, where we’re both at our lives and our businesses and the happiness that you bought, we’ve been through a journey that not many survive and you know, me, not many, many surviving, then Sherry was close to close to doing that. If you watch the replay later on, you can go back into it. And you know, it’s just to inspire other people to want a little more, a little bit more because the wisdom you gain is not going to be really fulfilling unless you can share with somebody else to change the path of their life and what they got going.
Gordon Wat (28:00):
One, what is a family mindset, all different types of things, because I’m not money, money motivated anymore. Right. Neither am I. It’s so strange that it’s weird. Yeah. It’s really, it’s really, really strange because when I, when I take on a clients or when, if somebody comes to me with a proposition, the first thing that comes out, comes out their mouth Gordon. I know you can do this. We can make a lot of money. I get turned off. Boom. You mean, I miss him. It’s just so strange how life goes in that direction and where you move to because, but if you take somebody like yourself and you know, you can change your life for the better, I’m all for that. And, you know, deep into, even if I have to lose my hardworking money right now, which is not even an issue. Right. Because a lot of the times does that, does it come from wisdom experience or just plain passing off, passing it forward? Right.
Sher Tavares (29:05):
I think it comes from wisdom and experience. Um, , for instance, um, couple months ago I did a photo shoot here with a good friend of mine. And she was like, let’s go to Gucci after. Cause I shared with her, she knows like things, you know, my past. And um, you know, I explained to her that I used to be motivated by money. I used to be motivated by the shiny shiny stuff. Right. And so she was like, I was like, how I get over it? Because I know eventually at the rate, things are going, businesses going life is going that I will be able to afford to buy me those things. Right. And, um, so she, I told her, I said, I think I have this fear of that because I would do things. With bad money that I don’t, it just doesn’t make me feel good to think about having those things anymore.
Sher Tavares (30:11):
Right. So we want, we walked into Gucci and um, cause she’s a Gucci lover and there’s nothing wrong with that. She, she busts her butt for the, the life that she lives now, you know, working in her business, but we walked into Gucci and she’s like, are you okay? And I was like, yeah, I think I’m fine. You know, because sometimes taking me back to older places like, um, before, even when Kalani and I would drive down, um, my old stomping grounds. So like my heart would beat really fast and I would feel a certain type of way. And I wasn’t sure what it was. And even when we would have events here in Las Vegas and it would be on the strip or, you know, some hotel, I would always like stick close to the you know, like close to my, my click, you know, and I would feel all these things and it, it was really uncomfortable.
Sher Tavares (31:09):
So, um, we walked into Gucci and she was like, are you okay? I said, yeah, I think I’m good. But I was looking around watching her shop. I was excited for her. I was like, you get the earrings to get the shoes, you know, like she was like, should I get this? I was like, yeah, get it, like, get it all. You know, she, I, she was like, do you see anything in here that you like? And I just was like, no, no, I don’t make, I don’t, it, this does not turn me on. What made me happy was to watch her like, do all these things. And so, but then when we were in Colorado Kalani and I were in Aspen, Colorado, he parked in front of a Louis Vuiton. And I know, but he didn’t, he didn’t even know he parked in front a Louis Vuiton at the time, but I jumped out of the car and I just was like, I looked at this bag through the window and I was like, Oh my God, I think I might want that bag.
Sher Tavares (32:12):
But it was an That was it. I’ve never thought about the bag ever again. But a lot of people think like I build my business or I do what I do for the money. And I don’t, I do it because of the amount of lives that I’m able to change. And the amount of lives that I’ve been able to witness change in front of my eyes. They give you folks an example, um, in our company I’ve reached a level, um, it’s called rank six champion. And basically you, you can get a car, a free luxury car, and the company pays for it. Well, I still I’ve hit that rank last April. I still have not gotten my car and I don’t do it for the car. You know what I mean? It’s like, I’ll just keep going and building and shooting for all these things. But you know, is getting the luxury car. Like, you know what I mean? Like I’m just like, ah, yeah, I’ll get it when I’m ready. You know, like,
Gordon Wat (33:21):
I mean, it goes to show that you mean when you do things for the right reasons, things start to change really, really drastically. Now. Now, in fact, she’s doing this interview right now from Arizona meeting our other friend, that’s in a wheelchair, you know what I mean? And she just has this lifestyle right now, which is a few years ago. No way, no way she’d be coming. She’d be coming to my house going and what are we going to do this? How are we going to do this? I mean, it’s just on this couch. And we used to talk, talk stories and Kalani. I mean, just, it’s just such a blessing and a privilege to watch you help others also, because as far as taking the lead into an, you know, companies can come and go products going to come and go. The one thing that’s going to stay the same is going to be you the inner you
Gordon Wat (34:12):
And that’s what I always truly believe. And a lot of times, like some of the women that’s going to be watching on this replay or the people that follow us is going to understand a little bit more because it draws them closer to you. As far as being a whole person, knowing the journey, the struggle, the tears, the pain, the closed doors, you mean, and the triggers that you just went through. Just not even, I never even thought of that, that that’ll trigger and believe me, I hear a lot of purses between her and her sister, like five Michael Kors purse is brand new on the table.
Sher Tavares (34:54):
Oh my gosh. I think Kalani is so glad that he’s not like, where do I put my clothes? Because your shoes has taken up all the space. Like my thing was clothing shoes. It was really bad. But you know, those things Gordon were like, um, temporary, temporary fixes down like a smacking bundle on some ugly spot in our life. You know what I mean? Like it’s just temporary fixes. So I’ve always, you know, when I talk to women, I’m just like, if you really, really want to recover from anything, trauma, drugs, um, just, you know, just stuff you, you need to work, work on the inner, not just the outer even, um, when I coach women, you know, through diet and exercise, right? Um, it’s like, you can drop all the weight you want, get your body in shape, eat healthy, do all the things.
Sher Tavares (35:52):
But if you are not happy with the person what’s going on in your heart, you will never be happy at any size. You know, because when I talk to women, they’re like, Oh, I’ll be so happy once I’m a size three. Why aren’t you happy now? Why aren’t you happy with the person that you see now? Why don’t you love the woman that you see now? You know, what’s going on. And so when we, I call it the onion exercise, cause you got to peel back layer after layer and the more layers we pull back, the deeper we get. And usually if you’re appealing back onions to that deep of layers, you start crying, you start working through all that emotions and stuff, and then you finally get to the core of it. And you’re just like, this is what’s causing me to not love myself enough. Or this is what’s causing me to relapse. Or this is so once we get to the base of what’s causing people to feel or act on certain things and we work on that base, I think that’s where people fully recover and not just from addiction, like fully recover, um, period as well.
Gordon Wat (37:10):
Yeah. As a person I’ve peeled back. So many layers of shares with her family and her sisters. It’s not even funny. But look, look at the result. Look at, look at the situation. When I look at the situation from, from her son, Sonny to her sister too, I mean, it’s just, it’s just, and I’ve always been there because, and she always knows she can call on me any given time at any situation, whether it’s going to be for business, this, that, um, it’s just because that’s the type of person I’ve seen in her because it’s just so it’s just so fulfilling to see you become the person that’s helping carrying the work, shaping people’s lives, shaping kids lives, showing, showing everybody that this is, this is possible. If you willing to put in the work, right. Let me ask you another question. Sure. What where’s should women recovering from emotional trauma addicts, this or men focus their efforts. If they want to see it in both the short and longterm goals, where should they put their focus? Yes.
Sher Tavares (38:24):
Um, I think what we just talked about, the inner work, the inner work, a lot of people, what I’ve noticed is they want the instant gratification, right? They want things to happen right then and there. Um, what I’ve learned through life is that, um, anything worth having long term, even short term, anything that’s worth having is going to take work. And we have to start on the inside. We have not, a lot of people want to do the inner work. They don’t want to do that number. They want to do the outside work. I’d rather just sit up then do personal development or I’d rather, you know what I mean? Like they rather do that kind of stuff instead of really focusing with what’s going on on the inside. And I, I think, I honestly believe that for me personally, had I not like focus so much on me, but focus so much on me, I would not be able to give back the way that I do, you know, um, my experiences, um, you know, it’s just, anybody can pick up a book and read certain things.
Sher Tavares (39:44):
But for me, I rather learn from someone who’s actually been in the trenches, like mud, dirt, sweat, tears, scrapes, bumps, whatever it is like that that’s who I want to learn from. You know? So, you know, even watching you, like in the beginning of my, um, sobriety, like I would always come to you, like whenever I was feeling stuck about something or whenever I was like stressed out about something or whenever I had a hard time, like just really thinking what is the right way to do something like I would always call Gordon and I think throughout life having a mentor or having some, an accountability friend or just having that support system, um, it’s important whether you went through an addiction or not just having some type of mentor, somebody that you can, um, go to get advice from, you know, um, pour your heart out into, and they’re going to just tell you things straight.
Sher Tavares (40:54):
Don’t get you guys, you guys don’t get you somebody that’s going to sugar coat stuff and beat around the Bush. You need somebody to tell you guys how it is, you know? And so in each phase in life, you’re going to have different phases of mentors. You’re going to have different phrases of support system. You’re going to have different phases of people that you go to your, your circle. Every, every everything comes in seasons. And so I would, for me, I think having, having friends like you, um, having mentors in life is important. You know, people are people who don’t understand that will be like, why does, why would I need a mentor? They trust me. People need, people need mentors. People need life. Coaches, people need, people need personal development. That’s why I created my podcast is because I can pour out my heart and soul into this podcast and people can download it, listen to it whenever they feel, feel like, Oh, I’m stuck.
Sher Tavares (42:03):
You know, just probably get in. And I’ve been a podcast person and book person. And I wasn’t always like this, but when I started you guys, when I started my recovery Gordon actually got me started in books and podcasts. And he took me, he know, he knew, I love Tony Robbins. Like Tony Robbins is my jam. And in the beginning of my recovery, when you’re an addict, like coming out of detox and stuff, what you go see Tony Robbins in person. You’re just like, Holy crap. What just happened to me? You know what I mean? And Gordon did that for me. And in fact, when I was just telling him a bunch of friends of mine, that you took me to see Tony Robbins. And at the time I wasn’t even doing network marketing or like running a business. He just took me because he knew I loved Tony Robbins and that I was coming out of a bad place, like to feed a person’s mind, that type of motivation.
Sher Tavares (43:11):
Um, you know, it’s just is amazing. So thank you for that. Like, I always talk about that. Like I always tell my friends, like my God, I was coming out of it because even when I, the, my first week of detox, um, I was watching Netflix waiting for Kalani to come home from work. And I was scrolling through Netflix and that’s when I am not, your guru was playing on Netflix. And so try be like three days into detox and listening to Tony Robbins, like on the TV. And then like a month later, I, I don’t know exactly how much, you know, afterwards that you took me in person, but I got to see Tony Robbins in person. And I totally, that totally changed my life. Like just to have that type of support, just to have somebody believe in you, even at the times that you don’t believe in yourself, because I wasn’t sure that if I could do self rehabilitation on my own, you know, and sometimes we don’t know how strong we are until that’s all we got left.
Sher Tavares (44:17):
And so I just buckled down and, you know, in the beginning, did whatever Gordon said to do. And then life got busy. I went back to work full time as a dental assistant. And then I, I found this opportunity. And last summer I was able to bring myself home from a full time job and just invest vest, invest in my, invest my time and my family, especially my grandbabies. Um, and, um, in building healthy relationships, I think that’s super important in life. You can have all the money in the world. And if you do not have healthy relationships with other people, you’ll be the poorest person ever.
Gordon Wat (45:03):
I mean, understand it’s because a lot of the times someone needs to have that nudge, have that person that’s been there, done that, seen that meaning we figure a way how it’s, it’s a, it’s a gift. That’s a curse and a blessing at the same time, to be able to understand that if I could get this person to just hop this fence or do things, do things for them so that they can reach the point that they’re at right now is my blessing and curse because it takes a lot of time from a lot of, a lot of things. But managing that is going to be a lot of times. I mean, let me ask you this, the last one before we close out. Right. What final thoughts do you have to help motivate recovering women, people holding on too second chances to get started
Gordon Wat (45:57):
Or take that second chance? Did they have
Gordon Wat (45:59):
That opportunity to the next level, if they ever had one?
Sher Tavares (46:06):
Um, I would say, uh, if you want your life to have a meaning, if you want what you went through to serve a purpose, I would use it as a flip the script and use it as a stepping stone to go out there and help better other people’s lives. Um, they say, you know, that saying, I don’t exactly know word for word, but when we invest into other people or the more you pour into other people, the more you pour into yourself. So whenever you feel like whenever I feel like I have a crappy day or whatever, um, I immediately go and I send gratitude messages to people or, um, write letters and mail it to them.
Gordon Wat (46:55):
I got one before she went on stage, she went on before she, before she ran on stage, she sent me a letter from, I don’t know where she was yours up on stage.
Sher Tavares (47:05):
I was in Texas and I wrote that letter of gratitude. Um, you know, like, so if you want your life to serve a purpose, you know, a lot of us coming out of addiction, rebuilding life, again, we, you know, we, we start, we throw pity parties for ourselves, right. We’re just like, dammit. And you saw me do this. Like, I would get so frustrated. Like I ruined my credit. I can’t even get a decent place to live because I CA you know, I have eviction on my credit report. Like, I have everything you guys like, all, everything that you could think of to rip your life apart. I’ve done. Okay.
Sher Tavares (47:45):
So, um, you know, we throw these pity parties, but instead of sitting there wallowing and throwing pity parties and feeling sorry for ourselves, like the best way to, to make all of that count for something, right? You want your, you want your life to count for something. We have only one life, like, make it count for something good. Flip the script on your past and use your past as a stepping stone and let your past serve its purpose. Because that’s, lets face it,like we survived what we went through. You survived what you went through, and whoever is watching this survived while you went through for a reason, whether you think so or not, it’s for a reason. And the reason is usually to turn it around and share your experience. I just did a podcast on the power of your story. Like, there’s so much power in people’s stories, and everyone has a story.
Sher Tavares (48:45):
Right? And, um, well, it doesn’t matter. Like, like I said, everybody’s level of rock. Bottom is different. And so it doesn’t have to be anything drastic like yours and mine, you know, it doesn’t have to be like they have to serve 15 years in federal prison, or they were a homeless drug addict, or it doesn’t have to be that in depth, but it serves a purpose. And when you can push through those experiences, push through those tough times, you need to share those. You need to share those because not a lot of people, people don’t know how to get through tough times, believe it or not. People don’t know how to, um, like use, have coping skills or how, you know, and your life experiences can teach other people that.
Gordon Wat (49:37):
Yep. Yep. Absolutely true. And in fact, we’re going to have to end on that note. How can you, how can they find you on your podcast or reach you or everything what’s your handle is where can they reach you?
Sher Tavares (49:48):
They can find I’m here on Facebook. I have you either my personal page Sher Tavares or my regular, yeah.
Gordon Wat (49:59):
Her podcast, the recovering moms is written is pretty good. Follow her on Instagram and share Tavares on our website. And don’t listen to the podcast, the podcast, because this is, this is usually. I show other people different ways, different strategies. You can learn a lot from Sherry. She she’s, you, you can learn a lot from what she’s doing, what she’s overcame and how she can get on social media. And I just want to thank you. Sherry Tavares of ours for a great, great interview. In fact, we should do this more often because it’s like a lot of more things I can be on our podcasts. I’m sure all the recovering women, men, people holding on to second chances, know our audience learned a lot based on how you got started, how you ended and hold, how important holding onto second chances is and how they can use what they learn for their own situations. So thank you. You know, how long have you been with this
Sher Tavares (50:56):
Years? Gordon has been into play.
Gordon Wat (50:59):
It’s a journey, the journey. In fact, we were supposed to do it one on one with the cameras and everything, but thank you so very much. And I’m sure when people watch this replay for the people that I’m helping, not for the people you’re helping. A lot of times we can relate to that. And thank you for all the people, just going to be watching the replay. Please give us a comment, like a thumbs up. I didn’t, I didn’t tell Sherry this, but it’s streaming on YouTube too at the same time, but you can be watching this on the replay that forms on the podcast. We’ll talk real stories, real change. And if you want any more, you guys have a great day and it’s just such a pleasure serving you and watching you all change in a way that’s in between me and Sherry. We just want to help people get to where they need to be. You mean, and if we can use our stories, our situations, like she said, we rolled around in the mud infact. Sometimes I’m popping my head over the mud sometimes. No, we’re just getting, but I just want to say, please like share common. And if you have any questions, please reach out to any of us, leave a comment and we’ll get back to you as soon as possible. Right? Any closing remarks? Sher
Sher Tavares (52:14):
Um, no, but I forgot to mention, and I just saw it in the background there that, um, if any of you never got picked up Gordon’s book yet, or read his book, go do it. Like read it, call him, text him, message him, go get his book. Um, his book, he actually inspired me to start writing again. And that’s why I’m here in Arizona to kind of get some work done. But, um, his book helped me a lot. So, um, I know he’s been giving, giving it out to the youth at risk youth here in Las Vegas. Um, but go read his book.
Gordon Wat (52:53):
Sorry. I’m leaving. I’m giving it away for free. All you have to do is stop tripping over pennies.com. I’m giving it away for free as a PDF download because we can’t physically meet people anymore. I just give it away for free. I wrote it for, I wrote it for people to understand that things can move on. Alright, it’s been a pleasure. Okay. I will stop this and we’ll get together soon share. All right. Thanks everybody. Bye. Bye.